I like to call myself a fairly independent, smart and decisive woman, a person who can take important decisions and is responsible enough. What this means is that perhaps if you take me to a party and throw me amongst a bunch of strangers, chances are fair that I will be able to make decent conversation and carry myself well. I will not shy myself from the group and lock myself in a room. Nor would I get drunk and let my guard down amongst strangers. If you didn’t get my point, let me know and I shall praise myself some more.
On a different note, I never really wished for a layoff, but always told myself that if I ever get a break or an extended vacation, I would travel. I always have a mental list of places I want to go to. I told myself it doesn’t matter if my friends were busy and could not accompany me. I’d still backpack, stuff my camera and other things, and set on my own.
Perhaps the notion of traveling alone sounded more exciting than the thrill of actually doing it.
For I have been home the last 5-6 weeks. But I haven’t been able to let myself visit the nearby beach alone, let alone trot around the world. Every now and then, I find myself desperately asking people if they want to go on a trip. I am ready to organize the trip and put in the hard work, but I just find myself incapable of hopping onto a plane, renting a car, and visit the places I have always wanted to.
Worse, I hear these lame voices in my head- Wait till the weather gets better. What if my car breaks down? I have never even changed flat tires. What if I am attacked by a bunch of goons? Traveling alone is not fun.
I know that this is the time to travel, since once I get back to school/work, there will never be enough time. I have always wanted to see Florida, the Utah national parks, Grand Canyon, Colorado, Europe, and a lot more. Yet all I do these days is borrow travel books from the library and read them voraciously. By now, I am sure I know about everything there is to see in the US. But this is all theoretical knowledge gained inside the house, reading books.
I want to ask you a few questions. Have you ever traveled alone? Were you scared? Did you feel lonely? Did you feel conscious that the world is staring at you and wondering why you do not have company? Have you gotten into trouble? Do you have tips for the things to keep in mind while traveling alone?
I will greatly appreciate your input, and anything that helps me get rid of my fear of traveling alone.
sunshine
8 comments:
I understand your problem. I am planning a cross country trip after my defense and have been trying to workout the courage of going across the country all by myself.
Not that I haven't traveled alone. Photography is my passion and I do take road trips on impulse for this hobby of mine. And just like the first time you go to the movies alone, you feel extremely conscious when you are buying th tickets or entering the theater. However once the movie start, you forget all about it and enjoy the movie and are glad that you came. However, if the movie/place you are at isn't good, that's when lack of company starts bothering you. So the first advice: pick a place where you know you would have fun.
The second tip: once you have decided the place, ask your friends, if they know someone there who can help you out in case of emergency. Chances are that you won't need them but having a contact in vicinity helps with apprehensions.
Be vigilant of your surroundings and in case you sense trouble, try to attach yourself with a family or a big group. You can ask for help from the security guards as well. Just say that you don't feel safe and if its not much trouble, if they can escort you to a safe place/your car (I have done that in the parking lot of movie theaters).
If you are driving and have GPS: please don't depend on your GPS or you cell phone entirely. There are a lot of places in US where you won't be able to find any signals. Carry maps. Google and print/write down the instructions of the place you are going to. Inform a friend about your plan in details and keep her/him updated of your current locations. Try to get a car with OnStar. Keep an emergency kit/flash light in your car as well as a can with petrol and pipe to fill the tank. Avoid travelling between towns in the night, no matter how tempting. Don't stop at lonely rest places/petrol pumps, no matter how much you need to pee. Wait till you see a town.
Well these are the rules I live by when I travel. Still I have done a complete 180 degree turns from few places as I didn't feel safe enough to get out due to various reasons. So be ready to do so...remember safety comes first.
Have you ever traveled alone?
Yes Have been alone to Rome, Salzburg, New York and some more.
Were you scared? Yes. Was scared and always very careful. Did miss out on some must do things due to the fear of going alone, but still experienced more than I would have had I stayed home.
Did you feel lonely? Yes. Distinctly remember this beautiful lake among the mountains in Salzburg and all I really wanted was someone to share the moment with.
Did you feel conscious that the world is staring at you and wondering why you do not have company? Mostly No. In New York nobody notices. In other places, the only people who were curious about me were other desi tourists I think.
Have you gotten into trouble? Apart from being stuck next to weird curious people in Flights, no :) .
Do you have tips for the things to keep in mind while traveling alone?
Hmmm, I can't think of much. Be Safe. I stuck to popular places, always made sure there were some 'families' in sight. I made sure a friend always knew my plans for the day and always made it a point to send a 'check-in' mail every night.
Just go do what you really want to do, You won't regret it.
Have you ever traveled alone?
No. I haven't travelled alone. But I think I know exactly what you mean and I have been (or am) in the same situation. Not being able to travel because of lack of company, is more depressing I guess , than not being able to travel because of lack of time or money etc.
Were you scared?
I wouldn't say I was scared to travel alone. It's just that travelling is a lot more fun when doing with someone else. Travelling with some complete moron who has no interest or appreciation in seeing the place, would still end up being better than travelling alone. Don't ask me why it is so, but that is how it seems to work. Wish it didn't.
Have you gotten into trouble?
Questions like car breaking down or bunch of goons are irrelevant. AAA or any roadside assistance is just a call away, and bunch of goons, for all practical purposes, happen only in movies. A major tourist attraction would be the last place goons think of. So, I don't think you will need to worry about anything as far as safety is concerned.
Do you have tips for the things to keep in mind while traveling alone?
Don't travel alone. It is one thing to feel lonely at home, but if those thoughts happen to cross your mind when seeing those marvels, it will just rob the fun out of it. The interference will be too much.
But there is a catch. I have a friend who travelled alone, and when I asked him if he didn't feel lonely, he said he just didn't. His lifestyle, would have made most people feel lonely. Others would think he is lonely. But he truly doesn't feel lonely. So, if you can bring yourself to that mindset, travelling alone might work. If not, it's better to take some moron along.
I've always wanted to travel alone, although all I've got till date is just a hint of it. The latest one being from my trip to Mumbai, where I took half a day all for myself and roamed around (read: got lost) somewhere... but I tell you, it's great fun to be out there alone.
You sound like someone who isn't scared of being alone, and you do know how to take care of yourself. I'd suggest... pack a bag, and just get out. Till you do that, you'll forever sit and just think about it.
Cheers...
So true... I'm tired of asking people to just come for the trip while I make all the arrangements for it. Now, I've given up and started finding out interested people in the first place. And made sure not to do all the trips with the same set of people, just to keep things random and not too jaded.
About advice and suggestions, Richa and Shell have given excellent advice. I can't think of any to add to it.... maybe, go to places that resonate with your values and your views of enjoyment. (if you are a non-hiker and stuck into hiking mountains, then you would definitely not enjoy it. Company might sweeten the experience but travel is supposed to be sweet, company or not). So, choose the place according to what you value and would enjoy.
Oops! Guess my suggestion is same as Richa's first advice... still I think that is the most important part of any travel, alone or otherwise.
Very thought provoking post indeed. I am sure this thought goes through every keen traveler's mind at least once. I know a lot of people from my motorcycle club who travel alone across India on their bikes. I have always been vary of that primarily because I am afraid of a breakdown, even something as simple as a puncture. Motorycles don't even carry spare tires, so you are really at the mercy of fate.
But I recently traveled alone in Jaipur and had a really fascinating time. I am quite enthusiastic about photography and I was quite happy being alone in my own world clicking away. At various times, I just sat in the magnificent gardens and wondered how the life of the Maharajas and Maharanis would have been in these huge, sprawling palaces. There were several times when I wished I could share my observations with someone or maybe even to ask for their opinions and it is times such as these that I felt really alone.
Personally, I felt that the people in the US were more friendly than anywhere else in the world. At least outwardly. Every time that we went on a trek when I was in Colorado, quite a few folks would stop by, have a chat, maybe give encouraging words and then move on. So in my opinion, it would be a lot easier to travel alone in the US. In India, we have a much more collective behavior and being alone is generally not the standard. While in the US, I searched for company, out here it is more like, please give me some space. So all the tour guides, autos stare a little at you when you say you are alone, but then that can well be used to break the ice.
I would say, plan for a short weekend trip to some place as your first alone trip. It wouldn't be long enough for you to get bored and you will get an idea whether you like it or not.
P.S. - Sorry for writing so much! Been following your blog for some years now but never commented actively :)
I am a traveller at heart. I was in LONDON in SEPTEMBER 2009 for a week to attend a seminar. It was my first time abroad . I have always dreamt of travelling the world, walking through cities and discovering their mystries. In a small way my dream came true.
I walked and walked the streets of London. Had to squeeze in time during the day between attending seminars. At night, all alone, I would be walking finding new streets and lanes, till the cold forced me back to the hotel. That would be anywhere between 1am to 2 am in the morning .
Never for once was I scared.
I hardly saw any sights. That I have left to another time. I strongly believe in Dreams coming true. To answer your question I am not scared to travel alone. That is for tourists not travellers
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